Monday, February 7, 2011

Underthinking Knockers

So I was reading this story about an Australian worker who was fired for using his work computer to look up pornography. Now this seems reasonable enough this is obviously misconduct to be um looking at lewd images/videos on a work device.
"NOTHING, I am doing nothing"

But according to the headline and most of the story, the thing that caught this guy was a piece of software that takes screen grabs every 3 seconds, so that the boss can see what he has been using the computer for. Every three seconds seems a little bit of overkill, I mean anything he is doing illicitly he will be doing a lot longer than 3 seconds. 3 seconds falls into the accidently clicked a link in you email and immediatlely recognising your mistake. I think probably every minute or five, would be a better timeframe.

"So Sarah, 3.5 seconds ago you logged into something inappropriate"
 Do you know what this guy was looking up though? Knockers. Thats right he got caught searching the word knockers. Knockers was a term used frequently in the 1980's as a colloquism for breasts, but like fluro clothing, the words rad and gnarly, and the cold war, its use died out in the early 1990's.

"Did you see the rad knockers on Gorbachev's gnarly wife?"
So unless this guy is living in the past, I fear he was the victim of a big misunderstanding. The poor guy had probably just watched an episode of Grand Designs, and decided that he wanted to renovate his house, and was going to start at the entrance way.

A nice set of knockers.

I mean admittedly they could have checked what pages he clicked. Also well I am thinking about it, why do people have knockers on small doors, I mean the original purpose I guess was when you rocked up to your friends castle he couldn't hear you unless you knocked on the door with the 30 kg knocker. When talking about a small door at some ones house what is wrong with using your hand to knock on the door. Is there a big problem with not being able to make a fist?, are they worried about bruising on their knuckles?
Jane hated visiting Dave, because Dave didn't own door knockers.

The only reason to get knockers for your door, is if its those ones from Labrynith that ask riddles to screen stupid people trying to get into your house, this would definately be useful in keeping Jehovah Witness's, door to door salesmen, and girl scouts away.

"A train leaves Union Station at 12 pm, another train....."


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