Monday, May 23, 2011

Underthinking Wellywood

Alright, this Wellywood malarkey really has to be discussed on this site due to the large amount of underthinking that has gone on. For those of you from overseas, or who have just got your internet USB stick back from your courier....

"Oh good my internet is here"
...Wellington airport has a large block of unused land on a cliff face beside them , that they didn't know what to do with. I am guessing they investigating converting it to Dairy, because that's what everyone else in NZ does with land. After a lot of R and D it was decided this was impossible.

"Look I just don't see how we can put fit climbing cleats on this cow...."
So they decided the best thing to do would be to build a sign, seems reasonable, the planes fly past this large area, and so it is the perfect place to say anything you want. Given the number of people that fly past this area, they decided they should commission an advertising agency to come up with something witty and informative.

And this is what they came up with?
Yeah that's right a giant Hollywood sign, you know because they make movies in Wellington -get it? do you get it?

"Yeah I get it, its just not funny."
I mean I don't have a huge problem with a Hollywood sign, the large white letters stand out on the hill side, so it is a good way of portraying your message, at any time of the day. It has worked wonders for the bustling metropolis of Mosgiel.

As a side note, I believe the reason for the large sign at Mosgiel was due to the large proportion of Elderly residents, so that they would stop forgetting where they lived.

"Where do I live?"
But at least Mosgiel just used their name, not Mollywood, or what ever it would be called. The advertising agency is under the impression that movie people aren't interested in places that don't end in -wood.

A name change is in order I think

There I fixed it.
Advertising agencies like to think they are in the know like that, I liked particularly how as a cutting remark, the guy in charge of Wellywood sign, said  

"Of course, there are some objectors to this idea – the same have complained about naming the airport Wild at Heart, about the design of the Rock, who don't like Snapper, or the brand of the buses – Go Wellington – and who don't understand Z is for New Zealand."

Firstly I wasn't aware the airport in Wellington was named, so I don't fit into that category, although if I did know the airport was called Wild at Heart I would have laughed. Seriously most named airports are named after influential people JFK airport, Charles De Gaulle airport, etc... Wild at Heart sounds like the airport was named by an 80's hairband.

Wellington Airport board of directors.
People that don't like the design of the Rock. I am not sure what the Rock is, but I assume he is means people who are offended by stones.

"What a terrible design"
Apparently people that enjoy fishing, or eating fish, don't like the Wellywood sign either.
I assume the corollary of that is these two gentlemen like the Wellywood concept.
My favourite is the last one though, people that don't understand Z stands for New Zealand. This is of course referring to the re-branding of Shell in New Zealand to Z. I had no idea why they picked the letter Z, apparently though its because it stands for New Zealand.

New Zealand, obviously
 Well it doesn't NZ stands for New Zealand, Z stands for nothing. If I am writing my address and want to abbreviate the country, I write NZ, not Z. If I wrote Z I presume my bills would end up in Zimbabwe, or Zaire.

"Why do I keep getting John Key's mail?"


    Want to keep Underthinking? Try one these.