Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Underthinking Osama Bin Laden

Sorry for my absence I went away on holiday to Waiheke last week, and was without internet access, which hampered my ability to blog. A lot happened in my absence Prince William and Kate got married, I ate a whole bunch of feijoa's, and the Americans killed Osama bin Laden.

Guess which one of these events didn't make the news.
Now everyone has had their say on the killing of Osama bin Laden, but I figured I might as well chuck in my 2 cents. So it is being hailed as a great success by the Americans.
My first concern with this is how taking 10 years to find a 54 year old man is considered a great success. Seriously the American military budget is like 500 billion dollars, and they have missiles that can navigate streets, they can monitor all your emails and phone calls, yet he eluded them, he must be some hider.

Osama's proud parents
Seriously it has been so long, that I was under the assumption they had given up looking for him. And I mean to be fair he was supposedly hiding in caves in the inhospitable mountainous regions of Afghanistan so it would be pretty hard to find him.

"Yeah, I don't see him, let's go home."
 But it turns out he has been living in a large compound, beside a Pakistani military base. And it wasn't inconspicuous either, it was 8 times the size of other properties in the area. Surrounded by walls, gates and guards.

"Wow, that's new should we see who lives there?:
"Nah they obviously don't want to be bothered let's leave it."
I mean seriously, right next to a military base? and it has been there for 6 years, they probably ran into him walking down to the post box in the mornings, or getting his milk. Well that is if he could afford the milk.

"Look $4.80 is just ridiculous price for Milk"
But apparently what gave him away, was the CIA followed his courier to the gates of his compound. Osama just couldn't help himself Amazon has such cheap book deals.

"This O bin Laden guy sure likes his Harry Potter"
So the CIA entered his compound and after a brief firefight, watched by members of the US government in the White House and the Pentagon live, including one Barak Obama, Osama bin Laden was killed. Seriously they watched it live, that is a wee bit mobid don't you think? Surely they could have just rung them after the job was done.

"Dad, Grey's Anatomy is starting, can't you just TiVO this?"
Using facial recognition techniques and DNA testing they confirmed the man they had killed was, in fact Osama bin Laden. Which seems very good, except they immediately dumped the body off a war ship in the Arabian Sea.
That seems rather convenient doesn't it? Can I see the body? - Ah no I we pushed him out to sea, as is the burial customs of his culture.

Because apparently Osama was part Viking
I admit the Beard might make things confusing, but he is actually Islamic, and well the Americans were correct in the fact the body should be buried within 24 hours, burial at sea, is only allowed when the getting the body to land is impossible before it degrades.
So it would seem more like either  a way to hide the fact that it wasn't actually Osama, or a cover up after some of the crew accidentally dropped the body overboard, whilst re-enacting "Weekend at Bernie's".

"Oh Crap, who is going to tell Sarge?"

The other thing that amuses me, is the news stories how it is safe to travel again, and this spells the end of Al-queda now that Osama is dead. The problem is I think given the 10 year gap, Osama has probably set up a decent infrastructure so that the entire organisation isn't dependant on him being alive.

"Come on let's go home Osama, was the only one who knew what to do with these things"

If anything this will give the group something to rally around, and they will probably increase activity over the next couple of months/years.


  1. Al Quaeda has always been able to operate without it's leader. The killing is only symbolic.

  2. I doubt killed him, Obama needed ratings and this was the easiest way to get it. Sad but true me thinks. Jarrah

  3. i agree with you Aaron. Also... check this out http://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/film/4954086/Eerie-links-for-Potter-and-bin-Laden biggest load of crap I've ever read


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